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The philosophy of “should”
Here we are, once again, in front of a period of increased stress levels, procrastination, moments of authentic despair and hopelessness -plus daily doses of unrealistic promises for “tomorrow”.
Everything else around acquires a special aura: the house needs imperative cleaning; the books need to be organized according to height, subject, thickness and title and you should probably finish watching those series of Netflix- better to get done with them already so you can start focusing on your studies. Sounds familiar?
Exam period is here and the emotional rollercoaster is highly recognizable amongst all of us.
Of course you also have the exceptions: the highly disciplined, hardcore pensum readers; those that sip every word of the teacher while attending all the lectures, good students constant in their efforts to keep up with the semester pace. Applauses for all of you out there managing to be such flinke students! I am not in this category. I am in the jobs-on-the-side-and-many-other-extra-activities-category.
My advice for all of you out there shedding a tear in the name of wasted time is: do not worry too much about it! Failing is ok. Bad grades are also ok. Being weak and hopeless is also ok. Procrastinating is also ok. It’s all part of us and our imperfect human nature. The thing is, as long as you start to get a glimpse into what your path might be, you will slowly build up the motivation to find your focus, to stay concentrated and pass your tests.
We live in a society where competition is encouraged, sustained and where we must perform all the time our best in order to succeed. In my understanding, this is an unrealistic way of dealing with people and the way we are all smart in different ways, unique and original. So my point is, don’t allow the system to put a “grade” on what you are worth; know your value is independent of whatever institution has to say about it.
Learn from your struggles and don’t forget to share some kindness to a fellow student in need. There are many of us wandering alone on our inner superhighways of shame and disappointment. It doesn’t have to be like that.
Best wishes with your exams, do your best even if your best is not your best! Its alright!
Erika R. Erdös
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